Migraine Meditation Technique

I have a migraine and I brought the tape recorder with me to bed. Someone transcribed the voice file and posted it to this blog. This is a meditation technique I first learned from Insight Meditation, http://www.dharma.org/

and, then, over the years, I've gotten more experienced at it. I did not have migraines when I first learned about this. I had back and neck pain, which I still have.

The idea is that rather than focus on how angry I am, rather than staying embroiled in the migraine, this technique helps me detach a bit. It's more of an observation; I'm observing myself calmly without judgment, and I'm very focused on the physical right now and not the emotional - although that may come up, and I'll observe it then. But I'm more focused on the physical.

So what does that mean? First of all, I'm lying in bed comfortably. I've got several towels over my head so I can block out the light. Now, you may wonder, why I don't close the shades, which would be better... I wouldn't need so many towels over my head. However, I'm in a building where management will still not heat the building, and, so, I need the heat to come in from the sun. But those of you that can close the shades, should. Make sure that the phone is unplugged so that there's no phone ringing and no sudden noises. (I know someone whose husband goes into the closet.) A few times when I was staying in a guesthouse away from home, and I had a migraine, I could not stand the sounds from outside, I lay down on the bathroom floor, and it was much quieter. You decide.

I notice what is the strongest sensation. Right now, it's on the right side of my head, on the temple. One of the most important questions to ask is: Do I feel a pressure from the outside coming in or from the inside going out? This is one of the questions the neurological doctors will ask. I often have to pause before being able to answer this question. For me, right now, it's from outside coming in on the right-hand side, and it also itches. After I scratch it, I get the eyes covered again.

Now it just so happens that I have Ulnar Neuropathy in both elbows, so I when I lie down I put a towel under the nerve (under the elbow) so that it's softer under the elbow that's on the bed. The other elbow is on my hip. Now there's a pushing sensation into the back. It feels like I've been walking around for days with a backpack full of rocks. Now it's on the left side on the lower back. But the strongest sensation is still on the right side of the head just over the eye.
There are other very useful questions you can ask yourself, such as: is it a sharp pain? Is it dull? Is it throbbing? If there is an intense throbbing, be sure to breathe deeply, in and out, as you do this exercise. I read an interesting theory that migraines result from people not getting enough oxygen to the head. So be very sure that you're breathing deeply.

I feel like I'm in the early 1900's when women were in corsets, where they had string in the back to tie it so tight that they could barely breathe. It feels like I've got something like that on my body because when I try to breathe deeply it feels like my back is stopped by something. There's also some sensation on my left temple in that same area near the left eye. My right hip also feels constrained.

Someone just honked a car horn somewhere. With all the windows closed, it would be nice to get some fresh air, but it would be too much noise from outside. It's truly amazing over the last few years I've been using this technique, I almost always fall asleep even though that's not really my intention. My intention is just to find a compassionate way to get through this.

There are some pins and needles over the bridge of my nose, just briefly, and then it goes away. There are some sharp pains also at the right temple area.

I had a cynical thought as if someone were saying to me, “Why don't you get a lobotomy?” The mind goes all over the place when you have a migraine. It's harder to concentrate on simple things like getting the date right. My mind becomes more sluggish. I may need to pause and regain my thought just because these physical sensations are very, very distracting.

I had physical therapy this morning, but I was not able to count - usually we count how many times I'm doing the leg lift with ankle weights or different exercises - but I just could not keep count today.

There is nothing wrong with reminding myself to breathe deeply because it is easier to forget. The weather changed quite a bit. We had six consecutive days of 70 degrees, and then we had rain early this morning, with lightning and thunder. Many of us with migraines discuss having difficulty when the weather changes. I don't just mean the changes of the seasons, but from one day to the next.

I went to a number of Meditation retreats at Insight Meditation Society located outside of Worcester, Massachusetts. Just Google "Insight Meditation" and you'll see that there are Insight Meditation centers in Denver, Boston, New York, D.C., Redwood City and other locations. If you do not see a location near you contact http://www.dharma.org/.

There are many forms of meditation. I'll talk more about this in upcoming posts. This exercise helped me so much!

We Did Not Seek Nor Did We Provoke (West Wing)

One of the many inspiring West Wing moments takes place in Season 4 Epsode 1 (Part II) in which the President makes a speech just a few hours after there was a bombing in an American university sports facility.

“We did not seek nor did we provoke an assault on our freedoms and our way of life. We did not expect nor did we invite a confrontation with evil.” So much of this speech can be inspirational to those of us with chronic musculoskeletal and/or neurological conditions.

We often wonder “How did this happen to me?” “I was not looking for this way of life”. “I never thought something like this would happen to me!” “ I just did my work every day which involved 7 or 8 hours per day of heavy computer use. Is that why I am in so much trouble now?”

President Bartlett goes on to say “Every time we think we have measured our capacity to meet a challenge, we look up and we’re reminded that that capacity may very well be limitless”. This fortitude rings so true for us. We have been tested. We have had to find a way to get through the day despite indescribable pain. For so many of us, the days have turned into months and the months quickly become years. This situation does require that we find that part of ourselves that provides strength we never even dreamed of.

The West Wing Season 4 DVD

http://www.borders.com/online/store/SearchResults?keyword=the+west+wing&type=0&simple=1

http://www.nbc.com/The_West_Wing/

You Have Something to Offer - Arabic

بالنسبة لنا ، نحن الذين سوء و / أو في الألم ونحن نرى في كثير من الأحيان غير مجدية. ونحن نرى العالم طنين على طول ، ونسمع عن العديد من النجاحات للآخرين ، واتساءل مع اليأس ، "كيف يمكنني انجاز أي شيء في الحياة عندما يأخذ كل ما أمكنه من قوة عندي من خلال الحصول على يوم واحد؟"أصبح وعندما سقط قبل 5 سنوات في نهاية هذا الاسبوع ، ومؤلمة مؤلمة لفعل أي شيء مع أي من ذراعي. تناول الطعام ، وفتح باب الثلاجة ، لتشريح كوسة ، تمزيق ورقة من ورق التواليت كان كل من المخططات مؤلمة. أنا كان باركت أن وجدت في الايمان في العمل. وكان هذا التنظيم الذي دفعني المتطوعين من وإلى المواعيد الطبية. جاء شخص واحد مرة واحدة في الاسبوع لمساعدة شريحة الخضار وإعداد الهمبرغر.بدأت اتساءل كم عدد الناس في العالم يعيشون مثل هذا؟ كيف يمكننا العثور على واحد آخر؟ وسوف يشع

لقد تحدثت كثيرا مع مستشار ، جين. وقالت إنها لا تريد أن تسمع عن الألم. وشجعت جين لي إلى التركيز على الأشياء التي جعلتني أشعر مفيدة. لقد بدأت تتحدث إلى جهاز تسجيل عن حياتي السابقة في الحادث الذي سافرت في جميع أنحاء العالم (انظر). وجين الإكثار من الحديث عن العثور على عمل المتطوعين. وشجعت طبيبي مني أن أفعل شيئا جعلني أشعر على نحو أفضل. في السنة 3 تعلمت التعليم المالي لبضع ساعات (انظر).في نهاية هذا الاسبوع يمثل بداية السنة 6 من هذه الحياة الجديدة. أشعر أفضل قليلا ، ولقد طالب جامعي مساعدتي بضع ساعات في الأسبوع. أنا تملي بلوق مداخل والمساعد الخاص بي transcribes لهم. يمكن أن قرأت بضع دقائق في اليوم.لأي من القراء الذين يرغبون في تقديم شيء للعالم وإنني أوصي بشدة قراءة القواعد الجديدة للالتسويق والعلاقات العامة من قبل ديفيد سكوت Meerman (2010). قراءة هذا الكتاب يجعلني أشعر بالأمل بأنني سوف تعلم كيفية استخدام الانترنت للوصول إلى الآخرين ، والرضا عن نفسي.تم اسم المستشار الذي تغير.أي وقت مضى مفيدة مرة أخرى؟ كيف يمكنني الحد من ألمي على الأقل قليلا؟

You Have Something to Offer - Portuguese

Para aqueles de nós que estão doentes e / ou dor muitas vezes nos sentimos inúteis. Vemos o mundo cantarolando, ouvir sobre os muitos sucessos dos outros e saber de desespero, "Como vou conseguir nada na vida, quando eu toma cada grama de força que eu tenho que passar o dia?"

Quando eu caí de 5 anos neste fim de semana, tornou-se extremamente doloroso para fazer qualquer coisa com um dos meus braços. Comer, abrindo a porta da geladeira, corte uma abobrinha, arrancando uma folha de papel higiênico estavam todos fora das cartas doloroso. Eu fui abençoado em que eu achei fé em ação. Esta organização tinha voluntários que me levou e de consultas médicas. Uma pessoa veio uma vez por semana para ajudar a cortar legumes e preparar hambúrgueres.

Comecei a me perguntar quantas pessoas no mundo vive assim? Como é que vamos encontrar um outro? Será que eu vou sentir útil novamente? Como posso diminuir minha dor, pelo menos, um pouco?

Falei muitas vezes com um conselheiro, Jane. Ela não queria ouvir sobre a dor. Jane me incentivou a focar em coisas que me fez sentir útil. Comecei a falar em um gravador sobre a minha vida pré-acidente em que eu viajei ao redor do mundo (ver 40countriesbymyself.blogspot.com). Jane iria falar muito sobre encontrar um trabalho voluntário. Meu médico me incentivou a fazer algo que me fez sentir melhor. No 3 º ano que eu ensinei a educação financeira por algumas horas (ver dontyougobroke.blogspot.com).

Este fim de semana marca o início do 6 º Ano da vida nova. Estou me sentindo um pouco melhor e ter um estudante de faculdade me ajudar algumas horas por semana. Eu ditar entradas de blog e meu ajudante transcreve-los. Sou capaz de ler alguns minutos por dia.

O nome do conselheiro foi alterado.Sei que a Fé em Ação é uma organização americana, mas talvez haja uma igreja local ou outra organização que ajuda.

你有什么要优惠

对于我们这些谁生病和/或疼痛，我们常常觉得自己一无是处。我们看到了全球经济的蓬勃一直以来，听到别人的许多成就和绝望惊奇，“如何才能做到任何事情，当我在生活中它采取了一切力量每盎司我得度过这一天吗？” 当我5年以前的这个周末下跌，它成为极度痛苦的事，都与我的怀里或者任何东西。吃，打开冰箱门，切片1西葫芦，撕毁了厕所纸都超乎想象的痛苦。我是幸运的，我发现在行动信仰。该组织已志愿者谁把我从医疗和任命。一个人每周走访一次，帮助切片蔬菜，并准备汉堡包。 我开始不知道世界上许多人喜欢这样的生活？我们如何找到彼此？我将永远觉得自己有用吗？如何可以减少我的痛苦至少一点点？
我说话的一个辅导员，简。她不想听到的痛苦。简鼓励我把重点放在事情让我觉得非常有用。我开始为我的生活中发生意外前，我在世界各地旅行录音机说话（见40countriesbymyself.blogspot.com）。简谈会找志愿者的工作很多。我的医生鼓励我做一些事情使我感觉更好。在第三年，我教了几个小时的金融教育（见dontyougobroke.blogspot.com）。 本周末标志着这个年6日开始新的生活。我感觉好一点，并有一名大学生帮我一个星期只用几个小时。我主宰博客条目和帮助我的转录他们。我可以每天读几分钟。 对于我的读者谁想要向全世界提供一些我强烈建议阅读由大卫米尔曼斯科特（2010）市场营销和公关的新规则。读这本书让我觉得充满希望，我将学习如何使用互联网，以达到更好地了解他人和自己的感觉。
该顾问的名称已更改

You Have Something to Offer

For those of us who are ill and/or in pain we often feel useless. We see the world humming along, hear about the many successes of others and wonder with despair, “How will I accomplish anything in life when I it takes every ounce of strength I’ve got to get through the day?”

When I fell 5 years ago this weekend, it became excruciatingly painful to do anything with either of my arms. Eating, opening the refrigerator door, slicing a zucchini, tearing off a sheet of toilet paper were all off the charts painful. I was blessed in that I found Faith in Action http://www.fianationalnetwork.org/. This organization had volunteers who drove me to and from medical appointments. One person came once a week to help slice vegetables and prepare hamburgers. To find a local Faith in Action organization near you Google "Faith in Action" and the nearest Faith in Action will appear. Each group has a slightly different emphasis.

I began to wonder how many people in the world live like this? How do we find one another? Will I ever feel useful again? How can I reduce my pain at least a little?

I spoke often with a counselor, Jane . She did not want to hear about the pain. Jane encouraged me to focus on things that made me feel useful. I started talking into a tape recorder about my pre accident life in which I traveled around the world (see 40countriesbymyself.blogspot.com). Jane would talk a lot about finding volunteer work. My doctor encouraged me to do something that made me better about myself. In the 3rd year I began dictating about making scarry money matters easy for folks (see dontyougobroke.blogspot.com).

This weekend marks the beginning of Year 6 of this new life. I am feeling a little better and have a college student help me a few hours a week. I dictate blog entries and my helper transcribes them. I can read a few minutes a day.

For any of my readers who want to offer something to the world I strongly recommend reading The New Rules of Marketing and PR by David Meerman Scott (2010) see davidmeermanscott.com and http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=david+meerman+scott. Reading The New Rules makes me feel hopeful that I will learn how to use the internet to reach others and feel better about myself.

(The counselor’s name has been changed.)

A Member of My Extended Family Died

Yesterday I received a call from my mother. She sounded exceptionally on edge and said, “I have bad news”. At first I thought it was my father or one of my aunts or uncle. “Slava Fintel died. We just received the news. I feel so numb.” I wasn’t sure how to comfort her.

After we hung up I started walking around the kitchen and folding towels. I unpacked 2 new towels with apples and blue trim and placed them at the top of my towel pile. I lined up all of the towels since I learned the importance of an orderly home at some of the Buddhism retreats I had been on many years ago. It took a good 3 minutes before I was conscious of my actions and decided to look for other ways to deal with the many emotions that came up at once.

My first impulse was to put on a movie I rent from Netflix but I had just mailed back the movies I rented and realized it would be another few days before a new movie would arrive in those familiar red envelopes. Besides, it was a beautiful day so I thought I would take advantage of the pleasant weather and walk. It didn’t take long before my feet started to carry me to a large bookstore nearby.

No matter what I did it didn’t feel right. World War II occurred long before I was born but I was left with very few live ancestors. My parents often met with a group of couples who studied together in Germany after the war. I spent many childhood days with these folks and their kids. They were my extended family. Slava, her husband, Mark and their 3 kids were always there.

Why am I taking this so hard? What is it about chronic pain and chronic illness that makes me feel so vulnerable, so helpless? If I were healthy, and especially if I had a life that I loved, would I be responding to Slava’s death quite in this way? My caring would be the same but would I feel quite so lost? Slava was my parents’ age so I wonder whether her passing makes the abstract of my parents’ coming death more real to me.

“Be with it”. I fondly remembered one of my Theravada Buddhism teachers, Narayan Liebenson Grady. When she first taught me that concept I had no idea what it could have meant. After many years of Mindfulness practice, I realize that my first impulse is to run from the many feelings, cover them up, distract my mind. So now, through this writing, I am observing the thoughts and feelings.

During the 1990’s, I took many relationship workshops, was in a singles support group, read countless Self Improvement books, and deepened my Buddhism study. Despite having acquired all of those relationship tools I feel as if I am in some sort of emotional demilitarized zone. I seem to be ping ponging around between a sense of loss and a dread of increased, future vulnerability.

It is comforting to share these thoughts with others who have long term pain and illness. Perhaps I am not alone in these feelings. There are physical problems, too. I have a Migraine with shooting pains on the left side toward the back of my head. It is difficult to fall asleep. It helps to remember to be patient with myself.